Yeah, I’m sure you like that title, huh, pervs? Listen, no one wants to touch you — anywhere. Damn you, pervs. I am so angry right now. This may get rant-y, because nothing makes me angrier than child pornography.
OK, I probably need to slow down and try to make some sense. Search terms are the best, right? It’s really funny/weird/interesting to see what nutty things people search for and (somehow) make it here? Well, usually, yes. Next week my month would be up and I would try to make sense of the latest random searches, but I am here early, angry. Why? Because I am naive and I underestimate the skeeviness of perverts.
Damn, I still need to try to make sense. A few weeks ago I posted some advice for the many moms-to-be that I know. I included what I thought were some humourous and innocent pictures of my son. I have since removed the picture of him sleeping with his hands down his pants because (GROSS!) so many icky pervs are searching for children’s penises. You weren’t gonna get that here anyway, Predator Peter, but that innocent picture has been removed in case you find it arousing. And all of this makes me feel completely ill. I’m a grown woman, who can more or less handle her pervs, but CHILDREN? Damn you, pervs, LEAVE THE CHILDREN ALONE!
Ugh, pervs, go befriend a politician or other cell phone-wielding celebrity. They seem perfectly willing and eager to snap and send penis shots a-go-go. Oh, right, it wouldn’t be arousing if they were legal or consensual.
I think that may conclude this rant. This has kind of been the worst week ever, and the pervs just had to top it off with some major icky guilt-trip horribleness. Momma Bear standing down…